


My Sunshine

by baesic



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, Domestic Fluff, Drabble, First Love, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Grief/Mourning, Implied/Referenced Character Death, It just kinda happened, Louis' POV, Love Poems, M/M, POV First Person, Short
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-23
Updated: 2014-07-23
Packaged: 2018-02-10 03:18:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2008944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/baesic/pseuds/baesic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU. In which Louis addresses his experience with Harry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	My Sunshine

**Author's Note:**

> It's just something that I wrote on a whim. Special thanks to my friend who helped inspiring this piece. 
> 
> I hope ya'll enjoy this, and if you do please comment. I'd love seeing your opinions!

It's so sad how people waste time searching for love.

For some, it's right besides them. All along, hidden in soft touches, in bleary eyes, in words whispered and confessed, and in friendship. If you're on of those, then I understand.

I know you would waste time searching for your soul-mate, and then, with a start, you find out that the love you longed for is in someone who was there all along.

_A best-friend._

And so, you start your journey of being in love. You start slowly, apprehensively, careful for all the touches, and over-thinking every word. And after comes the awkwardness, always second guessing friendly banter, texts slowly decreasing. You start drifting apart, because for the life of you, you don't know how to act around them anymore. So it goes on, you panicking and trying to maintain the friendship.

'Til one day, you decide to confess, just face your friend and word-vomit every emotion, suck it up and just own up to it. You want to go all out, you think of all of the cliches. You want it to be so good that this friend, the one you have so much hope in, won't let you down. You want it to be as flawless as the smile that makes your heart race, you want that person to be wooed by it.

So you book a reservation for lovely dinner, and then think better and cancel. You ask around for movies to watch and then you think; No, not enough. You become restless.

Your texts with your friend become frequent again, albeit a bit strained. You just want to be in the picture, so you keep talking to them, you just make sure you keep them into you.

The thing is, you can't keep them out of your mind. You keep thinking of warm smiles and bright eyes. You sleep on the images of them, on the fantasies of languid kisses and tangled limps. Then one day the person sends you a picture of themselves with a dopey smile in a concert; _"The lights are blinding!"_

-

_Your smile is blinding,_

_captivating me._

_I can see life through your eyes,_

_enlightening me._

_I want to be with you, I want to hold you._

_I love you, I love you, I love you. Please love me?_

-

And so you find yourself writing (or trying to) soppy love poems.You know it's long overdue. You have to get a move on, before someone steals your love out of your hands.

You hear from a passing couple about a carnival in town. A light bulb clicks above your head and you start working on a plan.

First, you try to casually ask your friend on the date.

Second, you arrive and watch utter joy spread on their features.

Third, you play along the casual manner and you don't lay your moves just yet.

Forth, you start friendly banter that gradually becomes flirting.

Fifth, you hear about the fireworks and your love drags you off to see them. You're frustrated that you didn't get to kiss them on the ferris wheel as planned, but you still can't shake off the fond smile that's stretching on your lips.

Sixth, you stand there under the fireworks while your everything watches. They watch the explosions, and you watch them. It's a beautiful sight that you want to remember forever. You just kinda stand there and watch in awe, as if you're on a trance.

-

_You're the source of light in my life,_

_and I orbit around you._

_You're the breath that I need,_

_I can't live without you._

-

Seventh, you realize that, _fuck, I'm screwed_.

Eighth, you just know deep in your gut, that it's now or never.

Ninth, you take that big leap of of faith and you slowly lean in. You kiss them.

Tenth, _He actually kisses back._

_Fast forward twenty years after that fateful night._

It's your anniversary and you can't keep your eyes off of him. Age have done him justice. Still as breathtaking as ever. You see him on the patio from the window and he's on the swinging seat with your daughter reading a book. He glances up and catches your eyes and smiles big; _gorgeous_.

Fast forward another twenty years. Your eyes keep welling up with tears. You've promised yourself not to cry, but your traitorous body disobeys. You try to keep it in;

-

_but how could I,_

_when the sun have set behind my eyes._

_The stars cried your loss,_

_and grieved you 'til times unwise._

_My sunshine you're gone,_

_you left nothing behind but demise._

-

You whisper I love you over and over again, because you think, after all these years, you have never said it enough. You haven't showed your soul mate how much you love them. You just want to hold them one more time, kiss them and just be with them. Life isn't fair.

Or maybe it's just me, the one that lived through him.


End file.
